The Birds Series: The Feeding

Those that know me know that I have an irrational fear and hatred of birds. (Actually, I think it's perfectly justified!)  "But Why?" you might ask. There are a number of traumatic experiences to point to and, in an attempt to bring some levity to your day, I'm going to chronicle as many of those moments as I can remember.  So...keep a look out for The Birds Series.

I have one other memory from that blasted bird pond. This one foolishly involved food. I have, sort of, learned my lesson when it comes to having food around birds… (not really - see here)

Back at the pond in the city park, but this time with a large bag of bread to feed the birds. Why I agreed to this madness I don’t know. I do know that I quickly realized my error and threw my bread pieces at the swarm of ducks descending and then took some giant steps back from the hoard. My poor foolish brother didn’t have the self-preserving fear that I did and thought the whole things was fun – he’s younger, he didn’t know.

Everything was going swimmingly, other than the skin crawling uncomfortableness I was feeling while watching him feed them, when the geese got wind of the free lunch being handed out on the grassy knoll. A pack (I know it’s a ‘gaggle’ but that word doesn’t carry the ominous foreboding that the word ‘pack’ does…) of large white geese came barreling toward the small blond boy in the crowd of frenzied ducks.

Now, my brother is brave and, when eye to eye with geese that outweighed him, he kept pulling out bread crumbs from the bag and throwing them out for the geese to gobble. But, geese are mean and greedy and their honking attracted another gang and the pace my brother set wasn’t fast enough and pretty soon his little blond head was all that was visible as those geese tried to grab the bag from him and devour every crumb (and maybe him by accident).

Mom, finally realizing that the odds weren’t in his favor, waded in to save him, tossing the bread bag to the side to distract the giant birds. (That is the sign of a true mom – wading into a mob of beady eyed geese to save your child! I just hope that I never have to do it! But I will…and then I will wake up my husband with my nightmares years later.)

Sometimes I’m traumatized by just watching something happen. I also learn from other people's experiences. I don’t feed birds.

Other postings in this series:
Birds, not just your feathered friends
The Birds Series: The Chase